i broke tonight

i broke tonight.
my body shook as i opened the fridge,
hungry for something
but not exactly food.

i broke tonight.
as the light came on i slide down
right on to the floor
and let the tears slip out.

i broke tonight.
the cat and dog danced around me;
unaware of what i was doing,
unfamiliar with the sound of my sobs.

i broke tonight.
mom had come into the kitchen.
she got me up off the floor
and into the living room.

i broke tonight.
sitting on the couch i let it all out.
tears which i had been holding back.
tears that were bleeding out from old wounds.

i broke tonight.
she asked me what was the matter.
i didn't cry often but every time i did
she was there. she was always there.

i broke tonight.
i tried to speak. hardly making sentences
but she understood my strange tongue,
knowing what had been going on.

i broke tonight.
she tried to help like always
but it didn't change my mood.
the blood still flowed down my cheeks.

i broke tonight.
she made me a snack,
hoping it would help me feel better
and i did but only a little.

i broke tonight.
she sent me to the shower;
saying the water will calm me
but i head to my cave instead.

i broke tonight
the bleeding has stopped as i write
but the wound is still there
and will only heal when the curtain closes.

this actually happened when i came home from practice tonight. i don't want to go into too much detail because i'm tired and upset. good night.